The 13 Unwritten Rules of Adultery

What you need to know in this “lifestyle”

Photo by Ashley Whitlatch on Unsplash

So, you’ve decided to step out? Want a brochure with some valuable information that you shouldn’t throw away? I understand you will ignore…’cause everyone learns the hard way.

I know I did. Just writin’ in the wind here…

What are the unwritten rules of cheating?

1. Keep it a secret. Duh.
2. Don’t change routines.
3. If your spouse becomes suspicious, you are fucked (and not in the way that you want).
4. Treat your affair partner well or they will leave you or take revenge.
5. Make sure you cover your tracks.
6. AND your affair partners cover theirs.
7. You have to be comfortable with lots of risk.
8. Lie well. Keep the lies simple.
9. Don’t believe in “happily ever after’s.”
10. Enjoy the moment.
11. Communication is key.
12. Set boundaries.
13. Plan the ending at the beginning.

There are many more “unwritten rules” of course. I could write a book, and I have, by the way. Affairs are so convoluted and ripe for misery that I’ve…